You’ve felt it. I think we all feel it. We’re a nation, a world in pain.
With everything that’s been going on, especially with so much thrust into the media spotlight – politics, social injustices and downright tragedies – so too, has come much divide.
Whatever the motive or intent, this new wave of public pontificating seems like it’s generating more negativity and separation than helping anyone find any common ground. It feels like it’s helping to loosen the fabric of humanity one little thread at a time.
But I think through small acts, we can repair that fabric. We can come together and remember how to find and respect the value of each other regardless of our beliefs and opinions. So, I’m proposing practicing a daily #admiration.
By that I mean actively and consciously looking outside of ourselves and finding at least one quality in another that we admire. It can be someone you know well — your dad or mom, your brother or sister, your grandma. Or it can be someone you don’t know all that well — the cashier at the grocery store, the fisherman on the beach, the lady jamming out in her car during traffic, the guy on the corner creatively tossing that billboard sign to try to get you to come to his business. Anyone. If you make an effort to find it, there is at least one quality in every human being out there that you can admire.
The real challenge comes in trying to find a quality to admire in someone you struggle to agree with, have had or actively have conflict with, or just plain dislike. Take a look at that politician you can’t stand, that neighbor who blares that awful music late at night, that random person on social media you’ve been sparring with. They’ve all go value too. No human being is one-dimensional. There are redeeming qualities in each of us. Every person you’ve come across will at some point feel the some of the same emotions you have, experience some of the same things as you. Just because we may disagree doesn’t mean we should willingly overlook the value a person has and what they add to this world.
Now, once you’ve found that quality to admire, why not share it? Share that you admire how great someone else is at doing something or how you admire a specific trait of their personality. Call that person and tell them, email them or post it on social media. It’ll make someone else feel special, and it puts positive content and good will out into the world.
Please understand that I am in no way suggesting that we stop paying attention to the issues plaguing our society; I just simply think we could do more to remember that every single one of us has value no matter what we personally think or feel about one another.
Maybe if we try to embrace that value, make it a habit of looking for the value in others, we can strengthen our communities and repair some of this divide.
A bit of a pipe dream, I realize, but I’m going to do this. I’m going to practice a daily admiration, and I’d love for you to join me.
Too often we (read: “I,” really) forget that it’s not cheap to share cultural treasures with the public. But then again, is it any wonder most of us not working in museums and other public institutions don’t consider what it takes to keep the lights on?
Why, with the grand exteriors of their austere buildings and the large, echoing hallways filled with artifacts and objects and their luxurious galas and events that draw wealthy, even celebrity, patrons and collectors..with all of these things, why should we think these institutions harbor financial difficulties? (Hint: you should read a slight bit of biting accusation here.)
So it’s interesting that The ArtNewspaper’s published this article today by Dan Duray, which calls out some of NYC’s most prominent (and financially well off) museums for announcing staff cuts amidst large expansion projects.
And that leaves many of us paying attention to the museum world asking *in my best Jack Sparrow voice,* “Where has all the [money] gone?!”
At one point, Duray suggests “Outside certain endowed curatorships, there is no obvious solution beyond convincing donors that staff and operations are worth paying for.”
As an outsider, working now on the marketing and fundraising side of the equation and understanding just how much of an annual budget and revenue is dependent on the generosity of donors, I’m inclined to wonder if he’s right.
Gift officers and philanthropic advisers/facilitators could remind their donors that in order for their desired impact to be made, investments in the workforce must also be considered. But, this responsibility can’t rest on the Development and/or Advancement department alone. Beyond building that awareness, program directors and designers need to be fiscally responsible and account for the overhead required to make their initiatives successful.
Or, you could skip all of that worry and fund your own eponymous museum of collectibles like the collectors who started these museums and foundations! Wouldn’t that be nice?
This is supposed to be an art blog, but I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again.
As human beings, as creators, art and life are inextricably linked.
So, for now, a little about life:
Today’s news is to say the least, unsettling. That over 50 individuals, all of whom were only intent on enjoying their night, were gunned down by a complete stranger because of their attendance at club for gay men—really, regardless of any reason—is unthinkable. Disheartening. Senseless. I think it has left many of us, many hundreds of thousands of us who have no direct connection to the event, just plain numb.
But what is almost as troubling is the deep rift, the likes of which have been an undercurrent for some time, that is now rearing its ugly head to the surface and widening an already growing chasm between Americans.
When news broke about the Orlando shooting, initial reactions were of shock, sadness, confusion. Speculation about motives – was this a terrorist plot? was this a hate crime? began circulating the media. I watched a poor mother on the scene, unable to control her weeping while being interviewed, cry aloud “I don’t know where my son is! He was in there and I don’t know where he is now!” Her anxiety and hysteria were palpable.
Alone in my apartment hundreds of miles away from FL, I expressed my own feelings much in the way countless others did on social media. I expected that soon there would be waves of support, thoughts, prayers, and campaigns for awareness and regard to those lives lost today. That there would be some push for solidarity in the face of this atrocity.
It was just before I was leaving my apartment that I started seeing posts dedicated to the aforementioned speculation on motives. I put my phone down and wondered as I drove to church whether the shooting would be mentioned there…
Intolerance. It’s not new. In fact, it’s how early civilization operated (and truth be told, some present day civilizations still do). You don’t like what I have to say? I’ll silence you. You don’t agree with how I’m running things? I’ll take everything you have, your life even, if it comes down to it. I am right. You are wrong. There is no in-between. It was the driving factor in this morning’s events, whether or not it had to do with the shooter being a radical Islamist or being angry that he saw two men express a public display of affection.
We like to credit ourselves with being so open-minded. Such a progressive civilization we are. Our forefathers left Great Britain to escape intolerance. But it followed. It morphed and squirms its way into the cracks of every new conflict this nation comes across. And it loves social media. It loves the megaphones we hold up as we proudly pontificate and promote our opinions, our righteous beliefs. As we shroud ourselves in the cause, the politics, the religion, the rights we so loudly boast our support for, there is Intolerance shaking its finger at all others. There is Intolerance sneering, “Your ideas are not welcome here.” There is Intolerance, laying brick by brick of another wall to keep all else out.
I chose to write about this because today, across several different posts I witnessed the practice of intolerance. I’ve seen it before, but today, the divide is stark and the conversations have been unproductive to say the least. I know and call “friend” to so many on each side of religious and political issues facing society, which in truth has been a very valuable way for me to understand as many sides of an argument as possible. I am in no way surprised that there is much debating taking place today.
What I am surprised by is the vitriol traded among people who disagree and the number of times I read things like “…and if you don’t believe [insert specific gun/sexuality/political/religious opinion here] then unfriend me now or let me know who you are so I can unfriend you.”
What a shame.
I am right. You are wrong.
Your ideas about this and anything else are not welcome in my universe. There is no conversation to be had here.
What a shame…
For those of you who know me, you may be aware that I’m Catholic. I went to mass today, wondering if (desperately hoping that) the victims, their families and friends would be mentioned today in the prayer offerings. I was profoundly disappointed that they were not. And though it may have been something as simple as no one remembered to add it to the reader’s sheet this morning, my gut tells me that they weren’t mentioned because of the church’s stance on homosexuality. Intolerance.
I wanted to leave. I wanted to shout it out so it echoed in the building that we should also pray for those lives ended, for those families that are now incomplete. Instead, I prayed it myself. I prayed it all the rest of mass, because it doesn’t matter what my church does. It starts with me and how I act and how I treat others. Each of us has that power, that responsibility.
I stayed through the service.The closing hymn was “Amazing Grace.” In those last three minutes, I listened to the most beautiful rendition of that song that I have ever heard, sung by an incredibly talented youth choir and accompanied by a young violinist. These kids truly sounded heavenly. It blew me away. I watched the violinist, who had been a cantor earlier in the service as well, sway gracefully with her instrument and as it projected its sweet chords to a swooning audience I saw her smile to herself—the kind of smile that overcomes a person at the recognition of their own talent. My heart leapt for her because she saw the value in what she had to offer, the opportunity to touch others.
My heart leapt because I was reminded of the beautiful gifts humanity has to offer despite what any one of us thinks, says or believes.
We aren’t always going to agree, but there is value in what every single one of us has to offer the other, and there is compromise that can be made so all of us can bond together over the gifts we share.
To shut that out is a real disservice to yourself, to all.